someone say that you get 80% of what you ask for. And I will admit my first thought was, I should ask for a whole lot more toys (i.e. books, video games) from my wife and I will get 80% of what I ask for. Selfish I know, but that is what first crossed my mind.
Then I started to think about how I communicate with my wife. I must admit and a great deal of how I communicate with her is truely selfish. It usually is, I want, I want, I want. This is a poor attitude to be sure. It shows me how impersonal I can be at times with my wife.
But, the effect runs much deeper than me proving I am a selfish individual. This attitude also keeps my wife and I from having a more intimate relationship. If I am so focused on my wants and can I provide my wifes needs? (And there is a difference between wants and needs) I am not talking about financial needs, I am speaking of emotional and spiritual needs. If I am constantly trying to make myself "feel good," how is that loving my wife?
The bible speaks to the husband having the responsibilty to love his wife. The wife in turn is to respect her husband. Nowhere does it tell the wife to love her husband. That really hits home for me. If I ask for things from my wife, even intimate things and I do so selfishly, that is not loving my wife that is loving myself. I will admit I more often than I would like to admit, love myself more than I love my wife.
Maybe I wll start asking God to help me love my wife 100% of the time instead of myself and hope she can except the 80%!
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